Weekly Nugget: How Do We Get Stuck and How to Design a Different Future

Hi friend, 

Ever found yourself in situations—whether in your job, in partnerships, or in your personal ambitions—where it feels like the same future keeps repeating itself? You put in the effort, you try new strategies, but somehow, the results are always the same. You wonder, Why am I stuck? How is it that no matter the changes I make, the same patterns keep showing up?

If this resonates, you’re not alone. Most people, despite their best efforts, move into a future they desperately want to change. And the issue isn’t a lack of ambition or hard work—it’s something much deeper. The real reason we get stuck is rooted in what we call "assessments."

These hidden assessments—the background beliefs, assumptions, and biases we take as truths—shape our decisions in ways we often don’t realize. These are the things we’ve taken as truths but never really questioned. They quietly determine how we interpret the world, often keeping us locked in old patterns that we’re trying to break free from.

What we don't often realize is that we operate with a background of unexamined assessments that shape how we see and move through life. These assessments are like invisible scripts running in the background, steering our thoughts, decisions, and actions. We think we’re being rational, but in reality, we are acting based on these hidden assessments.

For example, maybe you have an undisputed assessment that says, By this age, I should have achieved more, or I need this title to prove my worth. These assessments, which appear to you as facts, create an inevitable future—the same future, again and again.

You might wonder: How does an inevitable future come to be? How does one change the inevitable future? Is it even possible?

Yes, it is! The good news is that you can design a different future. And it starts with interrogating these hidden assessments. Ask yourself, Why do I think this thing I want is so important? Why am I measuring my success in this way? And what really matters to me? By questioning these assessments, you open up space for a different kind of future—a future that isn’t constrained by old patterns but instead, filled with new possibilities.

Imagine stepping outside the narrative that says you need a certain title to feel valuable, or that by a particular age, you should have achieved certain things. What if those are just stories? What if the freedom and power you’re looking for are already within you, but have been hidden by these long-held assessments?

When you begin to see the world through this new lens, you’ll realize that the path to joy, fulfillment, and success isn’t about more strategies—it’s about breaking free from the constraints of these limiting assessments. This is the real work of designing a different future—one that is aligned with who you truly are, not who you’ve believed you need to be.

This insight took me 20 years to arrive at, and I want you to have it as my gift. When you begin to see the hidden assessments that are driving your decisions and learn how to break free from them, you can finally design a life that fulfills you, a life that brings you joy and meaning.

Like Rumi says, “the diamond necklace you’ve been searching room to room for is already around your neck.” The solution isn’t out there—it’s already within you, waiting to be uncovered.

So this week, I encourage you to ponder whether you are stuck because of the assessments you’re holding onto. Ask yourself, What beliefs have I taken for granted that might be limiting my future? If you’re ready to break free and design a different future, I’m happy to help you think through it. The life you want is already within reach—it’s just a matter of seeing it.

Warmly,
Saqib