Weekly Nugget: 3 Questions I Ask Myself Before Important Meetings

Hi friend, 

Have you ever felt nervous or ungrounded before a meeting, thinking you had not prepared enough, done enough research, or were unsure how the other person was going to react?

I certainly have.

Here are three questions I have created to help myself and my clients get grounded before any important meeting. I often ask my team members to remind me and each other of these.

This has been a powerful practice that I now want to share with you. The questions are:

🤔 What am I standing for in the conversation? What matters here?
🤔 What mood am I predisposed to having that might block me in the meeting?
🤔 What new mood would I like to invite to the meeting that will be helpful?

Let's explore these further:

Q1. What am I standing for in the conversation? What matters here?

This first question has to do with “what really matters” in the conversation. Asking this question often reveals to me the hidden agendas of my little voices. From there, I am in better shape to manage my little agendas (looking good, feeling good, having to get my way, etc.) in service to bigger agendas like creating a trustworthy and mutually respectful relationship toward shared goals and concerns.

Q2. What mood am I predisposed to having that might block me in the meeting?

The second question helps you learn about the bad moods you historically fall into automatically. When you learn about these invisible moods you carry with you, you have a new kind of power and possibility to be responsible for those moods. Tuning into your bad moods can help you begin to see new possibilities for shifting them over the long arc of time and be responsible for them in the meantime.

Q3. What new mood would I like to invite to the meeting that will be helpful?

The third question helps you take full responsibility for the future you want to create in the meeting with your mood. We are generally double-blind to the phenomenon of our background moods creating or closing possibilities in important conversations.

When you ask yourself what mood you want to invite, there begins to be anticipation for that mood, a new opening, and a possibility. Good moods to invite to meetings are listening, seriousness, joy, enthusiasm, passion, concern, and care for shared concerns.

These questions shift my focus from navigating meetings with a fixed, often defensive mindset to engaging in them as opportunities for growth and connection.

Give them a try next time you feel nervous going into a meeting, and let me know how it goes!

With care,

Saqib